Dear [□ Sir / □ Madam / □ Representative / □ Journalist / □ Idiot],
I know you believe you know a great deal about
[□ linguistics / □ children's literature / □ law / □ psychology / □ other (please specify)] simply because you
[□ use language / □ read Harry Potter and Goodnight Moon / □ watch Law & Order / □ have a mind], or because you've read a newspaper article about
[□ the lack of numbers in Pirahã / □ Dumbledore being gay / □ some Supreme Court decision / □ Prozac]. But please understand that the issues in this field are far more complicated than you realize. For instance, the field isn't all about
[□ proper grammar / □ writing children's books / □ litigation / □ schizophrenia]; those of us practicing in the field spend much of our time reading articles, synthesizing facts, and seeking a deeper understanding of [□ language / □ literature / □ law / □ the mind]. I'm not saying that you can't have an opinion until you've
[□ understood an article by Chomsky / □ read every Caldecott and Newbery Medal winner / □ argued a case before the Supreme Court / □ spent three years running rodents through mazes] —in fact, most of the people in our field have never done that. But we'd appreciate it if you either consult an expert, or educate yourself a little more by
[□ taking a course or two / □ taking a course or two / □ taking a course or two / □ taking a course or two] so that you have a basic understanding of what's going on in the field, before you confidently proclaim
[□ English should be the official language of the United States / □ some word or phrase that's been around for hundreds of years is a clear sign that English has changed for the worse in the last five years / □ English is at all special / □ Dumbledore is gay / □ J.K. Rowling is daring and innovative / □ children's books are simplistic / □ someone on trial is clearly innocent or guilty / □ some law would clearly heal or harm the country / □ the candidate's plan is unworkable / □ the mind works in a certain way / □ Prozac is the answer / □ Prozac is not the answer / □ anything else, really]. Thank you for your time. See you in [□ class / □ the library / □ court / □ therapy / □ Hell].
Yours,
[□ __________(your name here)__________]http://cqs.livejournal.com/40687.html
